I love my parents.
I was sad to leave them in August of last year, and I enjoy seeing them when I go home or when they visit me. You could say I even miss their authoritative parenting.
College is a world in which you can act as if your parents are still watching, go absolutely wild and throw away 18-19 years of your parents’ efforts, or find the happy medium. Find that medium and taste the sweet freedoms you are paying tuition for:
Cursing – College students curse out of frustration, excitement, anger, and even to add flair to emotionally neutral sentences. Most people wouldn’t dare to curse around their parents at risk of receiving “the look” or getting their mouths scrubbed with soap. But once you get to college, everyone curses. You probably have (or had) a roommate that loves to pepper his/her speech with four-letter words. Even professors spout out obscenities to emphasize points and to keep the students entertained.
What I recommend: Lock yourself in your dorm and shout out all the words your parents never let you say. Slip an “h-e-double hockey sticks” or a “Hoover Dam(n)” into a conversation and get the rush, because your parents can’t ground you for it.
What I don’t recommend: Overusing these words, or letting them slip in front of your parents on accident when you return home. I let “s—“ fly twice this last weekend in the car with my mom and dad and they asked, “So do you say the f-word, too?” Awkward.
Not Getting Ready – When you were in high school, your mom/dad would never have let you leave the house looking like you rolled out of bed. If my sister or I had on leggings or sweats, hadn’t tamed our hair or washed up, or if our ensembles were noticeably off-kilter, we were not allowed out the front door. Now, in college, I am out of place in my blouse and Levi’s! I will admit that sometimes, I don’t do my makeup or hair, but that’s only if I’m pressed for time. Only on the worst days do I not wear proper bottoms and wear leggings. Based on the amount of leggings on campus at any given time, I’m an oddball.
What I recommend: Rocking the just-woke-up fashion only on necessary occasions. Do what you want with your hair and makeup. I know I do.
What I don’t recommend: Sticking it to your parents by not brushing your teeth/bathing/etc. That shouldn’t even have crossed your mind. (Not cleaning your room goes along with this.)
Procrastinating – Okay, so you’ve been getting away with this since middle school. However, your parents aren’t around in college to ask you what assignments you are or should be working on. My mom and dad used to interrogate me when I told them I had no homework (that was usually a lie): “What do you mean you don’t have homework?” “You have to have something to do.” “Why not get a jumpstart on homework not due tomorrow?” Yikes. They saw right through me. Now, if I want to procrastinate, no one gripes at me about it.
What I recommend: Not doing this often. Putting assignments off is the worst habit a college student can develop – it’s the most fun while you’re doing it and the least fun when it bites you in the butt.
Not Going to Class – I recommend trying this once for the experience and never doing it again. Making a habit of skipping class is poisonous to any college career. Do not even skip those non-mandatory lectures. Think about how much money you’re wasting or information you’re missing! You may be able to get away with this now, because your college won’t call your parents and let them know you weren’t in your 8am French class all last week. It’s the fast track to failure.
Going Out Whenever/Having Friends Over Whenever/Doing Whatever You Want Until All Hours of the Morning – This one is pretty cool, I will admit. No more having to ask for permission to go out to dinner, go to a friend’s house, stay the night away from home, and the big ticket item: no more curfews! This requires a lot of responsibility, however. This level of freedom is dangerous for a student’s academic performance and health if not handled sensibly. I would recommend late-night study sessions with, say, your fellow Crew team members over a hardy party session at the club, because that’s what I do and it’s worked out for me so far. The last time I went to the club on a Thursday night, I accidentally slept through my Honors Astronomy course the next morning.
Summary: The level of freedom you have in high school is nothing compared to the freedom you’ll have in college.